The Art of Dumping

There will usually come sometime in your life when you will have to say "no".
Whether it was to that liver (kalegi) your mom tried to feed you when you were 3, or to that ketchup your cousin wanted to put on your rice (chawal) saying was the tastiest thing in the world, or to that "slimming" shake (lassi) your Daddi ji tried to give you when you were 15.

In the case of liver, it was easy for you to say no because you were young and you didn't realize that something that smelled so bad and looked pretty gruesome was actually good for you. In the case of ketchup and chawal, you could say no because your cousin definitely wasn't from America, and ketchup and rice (chawal) is just too weird. In the case of that "shake" you had to say no because you refused to believe that 1) you were overweight or 2) that it would work even if you were.

Now we are older, times have changed.
Some of us are looking for that special someone.
Some of us have that special someone and are trying to get a certain someone off our case.
Some of us insist that we are not looking for that special someone, when in reality we are in denial and/or do not realize what we really need.

Whether the guy* is like liver (kalegi) , or ketchup, or lassi; you need a way to "shake" him off. If he's like liver, you just need to tell him he's not your type. Just be like "dude, I'm just not digging this, I'm sorry this isn't gonna work out"

If the guy's like ketchup, you have to make it clear that you like your chawal just fine. Just be like "Dude I'm sorry this isn't the way we roll! I like plain rice"

If the guy's like lassi, you will probably not have a problem saying no because, well, you are in denial. Lol but if you are really confused, just say that you know you might need something, but it's not you yet. Just be like "Dude, thanks for the offer, but I'm gonna find a drink that doesn't give me the skeevies"

What if the "food" isn't kelagi, ketchup or lassi?

The catchall tried and true cure is to run far far away from the "food" as possible.
The other party will get the hint, and you didn't have to say anything.

OR

You can politely inqaar from the food and give a nice dua.
Like "Nahi shukria (other party). Jazakallah. Barai meherbani. Khuda apka bala karay. So saal jeeyain. Allah talah appkay saray kaam ahsan kardein ameen"

and then say good riddens afterwards.



*guys tend to not really care about this art.